On a Sunday morning in January, 39-year-old Rachel Stern left home, leaving a note for her husband that read, “I am completely broken. I just need some space.” Rachel recalls that day as a nightmare. “I didn’t want to spend time or play with my kids. I was functioning like a machine, completely drained mentally,” she said.
A brand strategist by profession, Rachel has two sons, aged five and two. Her story is not unique, many parents around the world face similar struggles. Experts call this condition Parental Burnout, a mental state where parents experience extreme and persistent stress. In severe cases, this can lead to suicidal thoughts.
More Dangerous Than Job Burnout or Depression
Researchers believe parental burnout can be even more dangerous than job burnout or depression. At the University of Louvain, Belgium, extensive research is being conducted on this issue. Led by Professor Moïra Mikolajczak and Isabelle Roskam, a study involving 30,000 parents was carried out. The researchers developed a 23-point questionnaire to help parents determine whether they were experiencing normal fatigue or serious mental stress.
According to the study, this issue is more prevalent in countries where individual achievements and perfectionism are highly valued, such as the United States, Canada, Belgium, and Poland.
Balancing Expectations is Key
Experts suggest that to combat parental burnout, parents must balance their expectations. Alyssa Soto, a real estate agent from the United States, found herself in a state of burnout. To cope, she started involving her children in household chores. “I realized that I don’t need to give 110% all the time. I can’t exhaust myself to be a good mother,” she said.
Experts emphasize that perfection is not necessary in parenting. Taking breaks when needed is completely acceptable. Recognizing personal limits and prioritizing mental well-being is crucial for parents to maintain a healthy balance in their lives.
